Marketed as “Find Me If You Can,” the latest lingerie line from a Brazilian designer, Lucia Lorio, comes equipped with a GPS tracking device. The owner of the device’s password (in theory, that’d be your guy) can track the underwear’s whereabouts (and thus, you) online. Thanks, but I think I’ll just pay the bill for the microchipping in my cat.
Want skivvies that send a message? Do it the old-fashioned way, with a playful pair of undies that reads “I love you” across the back. Or pick up this hipster three-pack from Old Navy, which includes a pair printed with the words “Ho! Ho! Ho! Oh! Oh! Oh!” Ostensibly, that should get you into the holiday spirit, or…well, you just interpret the message as you see fit.
Of course, if you’re looking for undies that neither say anything nor connect to the internet, we’ve got you covered with the best eco-friendly underwear and controlling underwear.



























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