I don’t mean to come across as a party pooper, but if there is one holiday I’m just not into it’s definitely Halloween. I only remember celebrating it once as a child and that one time it was a total bust. My costume was lame, I didn’t get a ton of candy and the candy I did get my mom made me throw in the trash. Sounds fun, right?
Now that I have a little girl I’ve tried to make Halloween fun for her, but it hasn’t worked. Last year I bought her a cute costume only for her to get sick and fall asleep in it before we even went anywhere. This year I’ve been trying to get her excited about dressing up, but she’s just not feeling it.
So even more so than in years past, I’m dragging my feet as we approach another Halloween. Because in the back of my mind, I can only think of all the reasons that I kind of hate Halloween…
1. WTF am I supposed to do with all that candy? If we go trick-or-treating, my daughter is bound to get more candy than I would ever allow her to eat. So do I just throw it all away? Seems like an incredible waste.
2. Do you know how much kids costumes cost? The cheap ones are at least $20. If you want to compete with the neighborhood Halloween fanatics, you’re spending upwards of $40. And let’s be honest, I can keep the costume in the toy chest, but my daughter is never going to play in that costume often enough to make it worth that much cash.
3. Speaking of wasting money, why am I buying candy for other people’s kids? It’s not the fact of buying something for another person’s child that bothers me–I’m more annoyed that if their parents are anything like me, 90% of those treats are going right in the garbage. That’s literally like money in the trash.
4. For 3 months, I won’t be able to grocery shop in peace. The Halloween display is right at the front of the store so on the way in and on the way out, I have to deal with a whining 3-year-old begging–pleading, even–for some candy.
5. The competition. I really cannot compete. Any attempt I make at celebrating Halloween will be half-hearted so there’s no way my daughter will ever win any of those stupid costume contests.
6. Call me a scaredy cat, but I hate Halloween decor... because it’s so friggin’ scary. From the blood-soaked zombies to the cobweb-covered trees, I’m just not a fan.
7. People always assume you share their enthusiasm for Halloween so when they see you don’t, they’re like WTH is wrong with you? Totally sucks being the only mommy at playgroup completely unexcited by the prospect of making your kid an elaborate Halloween costume.
8. Do you know what it’s like being the house that doesn’t give out candy? No fun. Last year we didn’t get many trick-or-treaters, but the ones we did we gave silly bandz. Let me tell you, those kids were pissed. All they wanted was candy and I didn’t have any. What’s worse than the look of disappointment on little Spiderman’s face?
9. I secretly hate the idea of knocking on a stranger’s door asking for anything, let alone candy we won’t even eat. Because I’m a little paranoid, I can’t help but think what were to happen if we knocked on a total psychopath’s door…
10. I’m kind of terrified by jack-o-lanterns. Maybe I’ve seen one too many horror movies, but those carved and glowing pumpkins give me the creeps.
What about you? Do you hate Halloween or love? Tell us why or why not in the comments.
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