Ahh, the slow fade, aka being “ghosted.” Unfortunately, we’ve all been there. We’ve all been in a “relationship” where everything seems to be going well, and then out of the blue, your Mr. Right turns into Mr. Wrong. Personally, I think this may be the worst kind of “break up.” Why? Because you’re left with unanswered questions and text conversations that are all one sided. Recognizing a ghoster’s mysterious ways can be difficult, however if you’re aware of the following signs, you’re next relationship may be one that lasts instead of vanishes.
1. He’s Always Making Excuses.
Meet Casper… the not so friendly ghost. Casper is a kinder or more guilt prone ghoster that relays questionable excuses. “I’m just too busy with work,” or how about “I can’t hang out tonight, I have this thing to do.” His vague responses can become difficult to translate at times. You may ask yourself, “Is he being truthful or is this another one of his polite brush offs? Generally we’re all trying to be good people, so we naturally expect the same in return, yet this isn’t always the case. Tip: Don’t make excuses for someone that doesn’t deserve them.
2. He Appears…Disappears…Reappears.
If my first clue wasn’t a scare, then his disappearing act should be a sure sign he’s ghosting you. His replies are now few and far between, and when you do receive a text, it’s vague and disappointing. By pulling away and becoming less available, he’s hoping you get the point. Tip: Rather than sitting front row at his lame magic show, pull your own Houdini act. We’ll see who’s the ghost now…
3. He’s Everywhere, Yet No Where To Be Found.
At this point, you’re tracking his every move on social media trying to discover one clue that may show you where he’s been. Well, Nancy Drew, let me break it down for you. If he’s still posting his shirtless Instagram selfies and checking into every “dope bar” on Facebook, I would venture to say he’s doing just fine. Tip: Focus your investigative skills on someone who actually wants to be found.
4. He Only Contacts You When There Is BOOze Involved! ( see what I did there)
If the answer is yes, then you need to keep it moving…just like he is. Note: boozy brunches, happy hours and 3AM text messages don’t qualify as signs of someone who is seeking a real connection. “Ghosters” tend to engage in more fun and flirtatious activities, rather than investing their time in REAL sober conversations that may lead somewhere. Tip: Keep this phantom in the shadows, where he belongs…