Hoda Kotb hasn’t held back when it’s come to discussing her split from ex-fiancé Joel Schiffman, who she was with for eight years before calling off their engagement in January 2022. She’s also been refreshingly candid about her hopes of finding love again, which is something fans understandably admire her for.
And the former Today anchor, who stepped away from the show earlier this year after 17 years, has once again opened up about her much-discussed breakup — this time in her highly anticipated new book, Jump and Find Joy.
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Hoda Kotb Recalls The Moment She Knew Her Relationship With Joel Schiffman Was Over
In an excerpt from the book which was shared with Today, the 61-year-old Making Space with Hoda Kotb podcast host finally went into more detail about the split from the 67-year-old financier, with whom she shares daughters Haley Joy, 8, and Hope Catherine, 6. In particular, the heartbreaking moment when she realized, deep down, that their relationship had run its course.
While attending a week-long retreat at the Hoffman Institute, which is designed to help people "make significant positive changes" in their lives, the mom-of-two admitted that she felt like "everything had shifted." And sadly, that shift extended to her relationship with Schiffman.
Hoda Kotb Talks About Being A 'Pretender'
"Our 'us' felt different," Kotb wrote, as per Today. "I knew I could say that I wanted to better myself or something vague like that. But when I looked around at all the people who'd shared their raw truth, I felt so moved by their honesty."
"They deserved the same from me. So, I said it. I told the truth about why I had come," she went on, adding: "'I am a total phony in my relationships,' I said. 'I'm a pretender.'"
When asked by Today what she meant by her "pretender" remark, she said: "I think sometimes you know that a relationship is – I would say good – but you think to yourself it's not deepening."
She added: "So, you continue along [in] the relationship, and I think the truth of the matter is sometimes you have to say to yourself, like, 'I feel like I'm an optimist.' And so, when you're an optimist, you want to make things work, and sometimes, things don't."
