Worst Dressed Celebrities Of 2007
January 18, 2008
Mr. Blackwell has once again let loose with his eponymous "Worst Dressed" list. Featuring names like Posh Spice, Fergie, Eva Green, and Jessica Simpson, Mr. Blackwell has his snarky finger on the pulse of all that is sartorially challenged. However, as a world-wide arbiter of taste myself (and by that I mean a girl with an internet connection and an impressive shopping habit), I'd like to tack on some celebs that Blackwell neglected.
1. Nicole Kidman: Nicole's fashion sense seems to have been slipping lately, making me wonder if Scientology offers a "style your robot wife" course at its celebrity center. My proof? Kidman has definitely gone south after leaving Tom, whereas Holmes has evolved into a sophisticated fashionista. These days Nicole sports hair that is severe and way too blonde for her complexion, a face that is edging closer and closer to Meg Ryan's rubber Halloween mask of injectibles, and clothing that resembles a costume one would wear to a White Elephant party. I mean, seriously, a silver pantsuit? She looks like a metal tampon. Has somebody been sneaking into her husband's crack stash?
2. Britney Spears: Yes, I feel bad for Britney. She's obviously struggling with sanity and battling the urge to force her viewing public into an impromptu role as photographic gynecologists. But unless dressing like a $5 hooker is a symptom of whatever disease she's self-medicating herself for, she is sorely in need of a shrink and a stylist. Poor Brit-Brit seems to have fallen into the mistaken assumption that sheer, lacy, and netted equals sexy. When, in reality, Brit's version of sexy reeks more of desperation than her wardrobe does of fried chicken and cigarettes.
3. Bai Ling: Bai Ling has many great loves – clunky boots, nip-slips, extremely small articles of clothing,and a tenuous grip upon reality. Wandering into her closet must be like stepping into Willy Wonka's chocolate factory. She probably has little orange men who sing her rhymes about her ensembles and a team of squirrels who hurl nuts at her if she matches.
Maybe these celebs should take some cues from the best dressed stars of 2007.