Weddings

Wedding Expenses The Bride's Parents Should Never Pay For

December 15, 2016 by Justine Schwartz
shefinds | Weddings

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Weddings are a big expense from start to finish. From the engagement ring itself to the honeymoon and everything in between, they aren't cheap. Traditionally, the parents of the bride pay for the major ticket items of the wedding--the venue, the food, etc. It's pretty old-fashioned (comes from the ancient practice of a bride's dowry)--but it's still how a lot of families do it. This doesn't mean that they pay for *everything* however. There are some events and expenses that the parents of the bride shouldn't pay for. What are they? >>

 

[Photo: Samm Blake]

An expensive wedding gown. If you're a fancy pants bride and want to wear a designer dress, it is not reasonable to expect that your parents will pay for it--especially if they haven't budgeted for it. Vera Wang and other designer wedding dresses can cost upwards of $10,000, and if you're parents only budgeted for a $1,000 or less for the dress, than you'll need to cover the additional cost yourself. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The rehearsal dinner. Typically, the groom's parents or another family member pay for the rehearsal dinner if the bride's parents are footing the bill for the wedding. It's a nice way to chip in on the major expenses. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The bridal shower. Typically, the bridesmaids or female friends or family members pay for the shower--not the bride's parents. It's not uncommon for a close relative or family friend like an aunt, godmother cousin or mother and mother-in-law to host. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The engagement party. The bride's parents should not be expected to throw the couple an engagement party if they are paying for the wedding. There are plenty of extended relatives and close family friends that are willing to host an engagement party for the couple--let them. And if there is no engagement party, it's not the worst thing in the world (many couples don't have them!).

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

Bridal accessories. The bride should pay for her own shoes, jewelry, etc., especially if she is particular about them. It's a little bit of a stretch to expect that her parents will gift her *everything* wedding related. Bridal accessories are a matter of personal taste, and therefore, she should buy her own. One thing to consider is loaning them from either the bride or groom's side. Older family members might have diamond jewelry, designer shoes or clutch bags she can borrow. There's your 'something borrowed'!

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The bachelorette. What happens in Vegas gets paid for by the bride and bridesmaids. Seriously, guys--this is a debaucherous event for the bride and her close girlfriends to celebrate her last days as a single woman. Doesn't sound like something her dad should have to pay for, right?? Probably best that he stay out of it. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The wedding after party. There are enough expenses associated with the main reception--the parents should not be expected to foot the bill for the after party as well. This is really more of an event for the young guests, aka the bride and groom's friends, so for that reason the couple should likely pay for this one. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

Groomsmen favors. These are typically taken care of by the groom's parents or the groom himself. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The bride's bouquet. Interestingly, it's customary for the groom's parents to pay for the bridal bouquet. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

Corsages/boutonnieres. Additionally, the groom's parents typically pay for any additional personal floral projects like corsages and the like. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The officiant. The groom's parents commonly pay for the wedding officiant, although if the couple is particular about who marries them (say, if you have a friend get ordained or some other non-traditional route) then the couple themselves will pay. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The marriage certificate. The groom's parents also traditionally pay for this. 

Liquor. Unless it's built-in to the venue or caterer costs, the groom's parents typically pick up the liquor bill for the wedding. If the bride and groom are particular about having a certain signature cocktail, then they should supply the booze for that particular drink.

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

The music. The groom's parents typically pay for the DJ, band and any ceremony or reception performers. 

 

[Photo: Style Me Pretty]

Author:

Editorial Director

Justine Schwartz is a veteran women's lifestyle editor; she's written extensively about style & beauty tips, health advice and wedding planning for more than a decade. Her work has appeared in New York Magazine, Huffington Post and New York Weddings. Justine has been with SheFinds since 2010; you can reach her via email at [email protected].

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