While your wedding is all about you and your husband-to-be, you absolutely want your guests to have a great time throughout the event. But that doesn’t mean you should toss aside what’s important to the both of you just to make your guests happy–after all, it’s your special day. So while there’s certain things you should do for family and friends (grandma doesn’t want to sit near the band; Uncle Jim needs a gluten-free option for dinner), there are other concessions that could ultimately cause more stress for you. Here are seven that planners recommend skipping to make sure you don’t have any regrets on your big day.
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1. Inviting Extra Guests
The guest list can be tricky--especially if parents are paying for some or all of the big day. But as Dawn Browne of Degrees North Images points out, adding to the guest count not only means you have to spend more money, but you'll also have less time to spend with your closest family and friends.
2. Reorganizing the Seating Chart
Creating the seating chart is one of the wedding to-dos that most couples dread. Then add in opinions or complaints from your guests and that causes even more stress. "While it's important to be mindful of your guests' happiness, that does not mean you need to start from square one just because a guest isn't seated with whoever they were initially expecting to sit with," says Karen Norian of Simply Eloped.
3. Allowing Everyone a Plus-One
"While it's perfectly normal to give plus-ones to guests who have been dating someone for a period of time, it's not OK for a guest to demand a plus-one, especially if they are not seriously dating someone," explains Norian. "Finances aside, think about your wedding day: Do you really want to share this momentous occasion with someone you've never met?"
4. Including Unwanted Wedding Traditions
Wedding traditions are important only if the couple thinks they are--even if the parents or other guests think they need to be a part of the day. "By incorporating traditions they don't like or want, it takes up space in the timeline that they could be dancing or chatting with their guests," says Brittney Bartling of BLB Events.
5. Feeling Obligated to Host an After Party
Don't feel like you must have an after party for guests, says Kevin Dennis of Fantasy Sound Event Services. "Oftentimes, the wedding day begins at the crack of dawn--which makes for a very long day. Instead, consider a good-bye brunch the next day, which leaves you the opportunity to decompress and spend time with your new spouse, and still have the chance to spend more time with family and friends."
6. Spending On Top Shelf Liquor
Brides will regret upgrading the bar package to include specific brands that only a few people drink, especially if the budget doesn't allow for it, says Carrie Darling of Carrie Darling Events. "You are multiplying the upgrade per person for the tastes or perceptions of a couple of people, which adds up quickly."
7. Leaving Dietary Restrictions Open
"While you absolutely want to accommodate allergies, if you leave it as a 'fill in the blank' scenario, you are opening up a world of requests that will make it more challenging for the service end of things," says Darling.
